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Introduction
Mr Speaker Sir, in all that this life has to offer, finding love and getting married is often seen as a major milestone, if not the pinnacle, of one’s adulthood. The institution of marriage is one of the oldest practices that have been established since the birth of human civilisation, yet the notion of romantic love as the motivating force for marriage only goes as far back as the Middle Ages and the American and French revolutions – but as for much of human history prior, couples were brought together for practical reasons and not because they fell in love. Even in the 20th Century and within very own our Pioneer Generation, arranged marriages were not an uncommon theme amongst Singaporeans. Perhaps on reflection, it seems that our understanding and experience of romantic marriages is of a much lesser degree and consequently our principles and laws governing such marriages likewise see need for fine-tuning and revision.
Greater Support for Divorce Proceedings
In a marriage founded on love, self-fulfillment, and companionship, it becomes plausible that a marriage could cease when individuals fall out of love or if ones’ needs and expectations are not met in a marriage – the former cannot exist without the latter. As a society, we strive to nurture and preserve the sacred union of a couple, yet as we recognise that the dissolution of marriage has become more common in today’s day and age, this Parliament as leaders of society must look to invest time and effort to understand not only the struggles of divorce, but also to provide the requisite support individuals need in the aftermath of such a decision. It is for this reason that the Labour Movement welcomes the amendments to the Women’s Charter as we look not only enhance marriage processes but more importantly, provide greater support for couples through divorce programmes for parents and kin in the midst of the proceedings.
To make the decision to terminate an unsatisfying marriage signifies a major turning point in an individual’s life, and I can only imagine the major turbulences and disorientations one might experience, being thrusted out of their comfort zones, and being confronted with intense uncertainty and inconsistency. Along with the heavy emotional distress and anxiety one faces during the different points of their divorce journey, individuals going through a divorce are also faced with many tangible and financial issues; often expected to single-handedly formulate ways to deal with post-divorce adjustments in areas of housing and childcare. These struggles were made real to me when I came across the personal stories of my constituents, some who had felt much loneliness and despair when it came to the dissolution of their marriages. One of my constituents came out of a troubled, abusive marriage, and faced immense difficulty as she had to find the balance taking care of her two young children, who were traumatised by their parents’ difficult relationship, and to look for a job as she sought to provide for her children and family. Many other constituents came to look for me for help with their housing after their marriage dissolved, marital homes sold, and they and their children unceremoniously faced with worries about having a roof over their heads. Many a times, my divorced female constituents have no savings, have not been in formal employment for a while, and are facing the complex conundrum of securing a job; finding the financials to purchase a new family home; securing the wellbeing of their children; and also tending to their raw feelings of a dissolved marriage.
Employment Support for Single Mothers
In the early stages of single parenthood, the ability to financially support one’s family is often of immediate and significant importance, and the Labour Movement has recognised the need to provide support in this area. Our union leaders – both men and women - have frequently voiced the need to extend employment support for single mothers who require help securing jobs after divorce. Since 2009, when Mdm Halimah Yacob launched the We Care for U project to help single mothers find work, the NTUC has made a concerted effort to render aid to single mothers not only to find work through women-focused job fairs done with NTUC’s Employment and Employability Institute (NTUC’s e2i) and NTUC LearningHub to surface suitable employment opportunities for single mothers. The NTUC Women and Family Unit also works with the larger Labour Movement Family such as NTUC U SME to promote flexi-work arrangements and work-life harmony practices that support women in the workplace. Earlier this year, the Women and Family Unit also piloted the Women Supporting Women mentorship to unite women union and grassroot leaders to provide career guidance and advice to the women in our community. Through this programme and the networks of our Union Leaders, many single mothers have been able to connect with job opportunities and build up their confidence of coming back to work.
More Support for Newly Single Mothers
Although these efforts have been made, our experience with newly single moms reflect the need to continue striving to provide support for our single mothers as they navigate a new chapter in their lives. The current amendments to expand the legal remit of our courts to prescribe programmes for children and family support during divorce proceedings is most welcomed, but I hope that such efforts would also be extended to newly single mothers who could very well benefit from court ordered interventions to be provided with counselling for employment, financial and housing assistance.
Furthermore, this responsibility to provide support does not rest solely on the shoulders of our courts, as employers play an important role in facilitating an environment that welcomes newly single mothers. I call on the government to seek better flexible work support for employees at all life stages, but particularly mothers with dependents. An enhancement of our existing Tripartite Standard for Flexible Work Arrangements would be a great step in looking to provide special assistance for single mothers who bear the sole responsibility of providing for their children and dependents. Many single moms have told me that they would love greater work flexibility to allow them time to send their children to and fro from school. If the school is near their workplaces or homes, it would be a much-welcomed relief as well. It hence becomes clear that specialised assistance goes beyond employment alone such as greater availability and accessibility of dependable and perhaps prioritised support networks such as childcare centres and after-school programmes for newly single mums. Providing these networks allow for divorced mothers greater assurance that their family is taken care of and in turn granting them the capacity to maximise their ability to work with peace of mind.
Mr Speaker, in Mandarin please. 如今，结婚不再是两家人的事，而是两个人在相爱的基础上打造的关系。但以往的婚姻绝大部分由父母一手包办。华人父母曾说婚姻是「父母之命，媒妁之言」、「嫁出去的女儿、拨出去的水」，但也因为这种思想，不少已离婚的妇女无论是在离婚的过程中，还是在离婚后的生活里，都受了委屈。我们不能对这些问题视而不见，再次呼吁各位必须进一步认识并探讨如何为已离婚的妇女们提供所需的社会保障与支持。也因为如此，在妇女宪章的修改案，我们必须为离异案件提供更完善、更符合情理的离婚法案。
当一个妇女被不适合、甚至不安全的婚姻拖累，最后以离婚告终：相信在座的各位不难想象几十年下来的风霜雨雪能带来多少身心上的折磨。然而她们面对的不止这些，经济问题、社会歧视、衣食起居、孩童的教育等等问题接踵而至。婚姻/离婚是人生陌路还是浴火重生，我们无法肯定，但我们的法案可以支持她们、祝福我们的妇女们。
Conclusion
If marriage is seen as one of life’s major milestones, then a divorce and its proceedings should be afforded the same, if not greater understanding. Although divorce may bring about unfavourable repercussions, such a choice should not result in lifelong calamity but rather a fresh start and new beginnings. The providence of livelihood options and its surrounding support mechanisms such as caregiving support to divorced women and parents is an important key to this fresh start. Although more can be done, the current amendments to the Women’s Charter are a step in the right direction. My concerns notwithstanding, I support the Bill.
